Parenting
An Egg Is Quiet
Having recently stumbled on this fabulous book, I decided to add a reading section for sharing the standouts from my trips to the library with Rain. The art in An Egg is Quiet is absolutely stunning. The text is simple but softly poetic, like a lullaby. It wasn’t too dense: easy to read before bed after a long night when I am often dissuaded by books with too much text. Rain loved all the lovely labelled eggs and even I learned things I hadn’t known before. I loved that the book drew parallels between bird eggs, fish eggs, reptile eggs and showcased nature’s beauty so artfully. Though the text was definitely worthwhile, An Egg is Quiet is really amazing for the pictures. I was transfixed by this book. There is a sister book called A Seed is Sleepy which we’ve put a hold on at the library and not yet received. Can’t wait to check that one out too. It looks to be equally lovely. Check out this info page on the two books from Chronicle. The books have received many many well-deserved awards which are listed on this page if you’re interested and there is also a free teacher’s guide that you can download to expand on the books. Inside: By Dianna Aston Illustrated by Sylvia Long Chronicle...
Read MoreQ & A
Rain has recently discovered that he can ask questions. This is a slightly more sophisticated version of the WHY? phase that all kids go through (some more than others – yes, I’m thinking of you, Alexis). Here is a sampling* of his questions from the last day: How do you kill a robot? What are chick peas made of? How do you catch a raccoon? What does suspicious mean? How do you make earth worms die? How do you make kale worser and worser? How do you kiss a tree? Why is your nose bendy? What is skin made of? How do you spell pajamas anyways? Do spiders have ears? *yes, by sampling I mean that there were MANY MANY more that I didn’t manage to write...
Read MoreSix Week Check-Up
Do you have new first time parents in your life? You’ve probably gotten them a gift and visited to meet the new wee one. You’ve probably puzzled over what a new family needs and how to help out. There are lots of great ideas out there. Here’s one I particularly liked as it really rang true for my experience as a new parent. To take it one step further, I’d like to challenge everyone out there to do the Six Week Check-up. That is, make a point of checking in with the new mom as her baby nears the six week mark. Why Six Weeks? Do you remember the six week check up after you had your first baby? Do you remember what else was going on for you then? Maybe you haven’t had kids yet or maybe your kids are older and now that you’ve left the sleep-deprived haze, those early days are all a blur. Let me remind you: The first few weeks were all bliss, staring at baby in awe, proudly presenting her to family and friends, feeling totally bonded to your partner for producing this perfect little angel. But now? Dad has gone back to work. The whirlwind of out-of-town visitors is slowing or they’ve all come and gone. Friends and family have all met baby and are back to their regular lives: working, house renos, family vacation. The new baby celebrations have all ended: the baby shower or meet the baby party was a few weeks ago. Friends are no longer dropping in with a cute onesie or yet another handmade blanket. The email congratulations have tapered off. In short, everyone else’s excitement has worn off. For them, now it’s business as usual. For mom? She’s home alone with baby and the reality of her new life is finally starting to hit her. This likely means getting used to the isolation of maternity leave. The first few weeks felt like a well-deserved vacation, especially after the aches and pains and fatigue of working while pregnant. But now, she’s kind of bored. She’s surprised by how much she misses talking to adults when she’s staring at the four walls and nursing AGAIN. She’s surprised by how much she misses the noise of the office (or the restaurant or the store or wherever it was for her) when she realises how quiet it is at home alone while her friends and partner are at work. When she sees her friends, she realizes she has surprisingly little to talk about now that she can’t talk about her work. She wonders what to do with herself and she misses that productive self, that woman who excelled at her work. It’s lonely and she feels a little lost in a culture that defines people by the work they do. After the standard first few weeks rest and recovery, she was feeling great and tried to get back to her normal routine, only to find that she’s still exhausted. Mama’s beginning to realise that her plans of continuing life as before with baby in tow might be a little unrealistic. Her thoughts of tackling some of those crafting projects gathering dust during her “year off” seem laughable now as she struggles to sleep enough, keep the house clean, shower and eat lunch. By 6 weeks, the new family is likely out of the extra freezer food they prepared before the birth and friends are no longer dropping off casseroles. Offers to throw a load of laundry in or pick up groceries while new mom grabs a nap have petered out. Mom’s learning to navigate the grocery store with baby (and all the baby gear) now. Every day is a list of laundry, nursing, diapers, nursing, napping, nursing, dishes, nursing, more laundry, more nursing, more diapers. She’s surprised at how little she accomplishes and she might be starting to get run down around the 6 week mark because she’s trying to do too much. Back to regular life? Not exactly. At 6 weeks, baby often goes through a growth spurt (also...
Read MoreConnecting with your Community
Parenting can be lonely. Your lifestyle changes drastically. Perhaps you are the first in your circle of friends to have children. Perhaps you are surprised by the isolation of maternity leave. Perhaps you long for a real connection with other parents rather than those conversations where you pretend it’s not as hard as it is. Perhaps you find the playground intimidating. Most parents agree that parenting is both the hardest and most fulfilling job they’ve ever held. You can try your hardest to prepare yourself but no amount of reading, observing and talking to other parents can prepare you for it. Parenting transforms your life to the place where you can’t imagine your life before children. And suddenly you find yourself relishing conversations about the minutiae of raising children. It just isn’t the same without a community to share it with. So what can you do to foster that need for community? Check out these articles on community: Finding Your Tribe: Feed Your Soul while Feeding Your Kids – an article from Mothering Magazine on creating a parenting community for yourself. Longing For Community – Natural Parenting guru and former Mothering Magazine editor Peggy O’Mara’s thoughts on community. Create a Date Night Group Join up with 3 other families and start babysitting each others’ kids. Each week one family watches all the kids. The other 3 couples get date night. So 1 Friday per month you might have a mad-house full of kids—the other 3 Fridays you get to be alone with your partner! And as the years pass, the kids will entertain each other and all you’ll have to do is make sure they are safe. Start a Book Club or a Knitting Night Find a group of parents and read parenting books to discuss at a potluck. Have older kids? Start a book club and invite the kids like the Mother/Daughter book club The Page Turners in the November/December 2008 issue of Mothering Magazine. Always knitting? Start a knit night with other moms. Rotate meetings so each family takes a turn hosting. Team Up Commit to regular check ins with another mom so you can encourage and support each other with your parenting challenges and triumphs. Agree to call each other once a week just to see how it’s going. Find a parent with older kids who is willing to act as a mentor to you. Check in regularly (once a week or once a month). Read the book The Mother’s Guide to Self-Renewal and if you’re in BC join a Mama Renew...
Read MoreDelicious Slop a.k.a Raita
Rain loves raita and I usually make it every time we have Indian food or make curry. He gets really excited and says “Mom, you made that delicious slop!” 1 cup plain yogurt 1/2 cucumber, shredded on a cheese grater 1-2 tsp cumin cilantro to taste 1/2 tsp salt Stir everything together and serve with your favourite curry.
Read MoreWhen you’re only three feet tall…
Rain is going through a phase where he says he doesn’t love Aaron – mostly for being too hairy. We know it’s not true of course but sometimes it still hurts Aaron’s feelings. The other day after I said “I love dad” Rain got competitive “No, I love dad!” I thought, “Here’s an opportunity to make Aaron feel good by stoking the competition a bit.” So we argued back and forth about who loved dad and then I said “prove it!” Rain, of course, says “you prove it.” I got up and went over to where Aaron was doing dishes and hugged his back. Rain ran over, squeezed between us and kissed Aaron and shouted “There! I proved it dad – I kissed your...
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