Posts Tagged "The Boy"
Rested Mama
Being a parent of more than one child poses a rather repetitive problem: how to balance the (often competing) needs of each child and feel like you’re doing at least a decent (good enough) job most/some of the time? I’ve developed a cold and awful sore throat just in time for the holidays so this problem has been magnified exponentially for me this week. Lots to do and desperately in need of rest and two little ones to care for. Sleep. Rest. This is a challenge for most parents in some way, isn’t it? We co-sleep. We co-slept with our son until he was about 3 and then we gradually transitioned him to his own bed in his own room. At least half of the time, he still has a sleep partner in his room or in the living room. He rarely comes into our bed because four is just too many (even in a King size) for me to get any amount of sleep. We chose co-sleeping for a variety of reasons (and that’s probably a separate post) which were still valid when our daughter was born and thus, we did it again. However, I have found that both of my children were/are persistent night-wakers and had/have a serious habit of needing to nurse back to sleep. Was this because of co-sleeping? I don’t know. Perhaps they would have done that anyway and co-sleeping allowed me at least a bit of sleep. Or perhaps they were so used to the accessibility that a bad habit developed. I can’t really go back and answer that question. What I do know is that after 18 months of night-waking (for the second time round), I definitely feel like I need some good quality sleep. Of course, this is underscored now due to my being sick. But I digress. I do not believe in letting my children cry-it-out. Again, for a lot of reasons. Read some here. And here. It’s been important to me to try night-weaning in a gradual gentle manner. With my son, in the end, it wasn’t as gentle as I might have liked but having returned to work, I was getting desperate and overall, I feel that we did the best we could. Yes, there was way more crying than I would have liked. But it always occurred in someone’s arms. My son was never left to cry himself into a panic of puking and exhaustion-stress-caused sleep. We are trying now to night-wean my daughter. I am trying to be gentle and patient with this. One of the graces of a second time parent is the insight that things do indeed change. As a result, I am much more patient with sleep struggles with my daughter than I was with my first-born. I have the awareness that it will pass even when it feels like it will take forever. I am much more willing to applaud the small steps forward and wait it out. But I am beginning to wonder if I really have that luxury. Preschoolers are infuriating at times. Age 2-5 used to be my favourite age…until I had to live with a child in that bracket. My son is four and right now, he is pushing and challenging me like I have never been before. He needs every bit of patience, consistency, re-direction, repetition and love that I can muster. And as a person chronically sleep-deprived, I do not have those qualities in me in the quantities he needs. Daniel Siegel, author of The Mindful Brain and Parenting From The Inside Out talks about being mindful and aware in our reactions. I am paraphrasing here but in general, this involves the ability to step back and see the situation and be aware of our intentions and other’s intentions before reacting. He described it as the ability to dive below the surface where the water is calm. From that place of stillness, you can look up at the storm raging above, realise it is there but not be affected by it and not choose to have...
Read MoreWordless Books: A Boy, A Dog & A Frog series
This week we are sharing an old classic, probably older than I am, much loved by my kids and by me. This is the Mercer Meyer series A Boy, a Dog and a Frog. The drawings are monochromatic and have a sort of timeless yet retro feel (as impossible as that seems). And I gotta love any artist that uses crosshatching. The pictures are sweet; the adventures silly. The set of three books we borrowed from a friend were also tiny, like 3×4 inches. This is a lovely size for little people. The books fit easily in a bag to bring to restaurants or other places where you have to w…a…i…t. Plus, it seems like little people usually like little things, things that are made just for them, in their size. There are quite a few books in this series and to be honest, I remember them from my childhood but so far, we’ve only delved into a couple with Rain. I’m looking forward to going through all of them. Most recently we read One Frog Too Many in which the boy who already has a dog, a frog and a turtle brings home another little frog. Unfortunately, the first frog is jealous and behaves poorly. There were plenty of opportunities for discussing emotions and appropriate actions. Mercer Meyer seems to have a talent for drawing postures and facial expressions that intimately convey emotion and we really got caught up in the feelings of sadness, disappointment, surprise and joy. The books have definitely been a Quiet Time favourite at our house....
Read MoreHow Poetic
I was tucking Rain into bed. With an arm around my neck, he said, “Mom, do you feel sweet sorrow?” Surprised and taken aback, I replied, “No, do you feel sweet sorrow Rain?” Solemnly: “Yes. Yes I do. Because I miss our friends in Vancouver.” Gotta love that Magic Treehouse CD for introducing my 4 year old to Shakespeare.
Read MoreQ & A
Rain has recently discovered that he can ask questions. This is a slightly more sophisticated version of the WHY? phase that all kids go through (some more than others – yes, I’m thinking of you, Alexis). Here is a sampling* of his questions from the last day: How do you kill a robot? What are chick peas made of? How do you catch a raccoon? What does suspicious mean? How do you make earth worms die? How do you make kale worser and worser? How do you kiss a tree? Why is your nose bendy? What is skin made of? How do you spell pajamas anyways? Do spiders have ears? *yes, by sampling I mean that there were MANY MANY more that I didn’t manage to write...
Read MoreDelicious Slop a.k.a Raita
Rain loves raita and I usually make it every time we have Indian food or make curry. He gets really excited and says “Mom, you made that delicious slop!” 1 cup plain yogurt 1/2 cucumber, shredded on a cheese grater 1-2 tsp cumin cilantro to taste 1/2 tsp salt Stir everything together and serve with your favourite curry.
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